As I reflect on my 16 month (and counting) breastfeeding experience, I think about the elements that have been critical to such a wonderful stage in the life of me and my child: the desire to breastfeed, education, resources, and support.

I always knew that when I had a baby, I would breastfeed. I was not always aware of the multiple benefits for both mom and baby, I just knew that it was natural and the primary purpose of the breasts, and it was good.

I was unaware of organizations such as the La Leche League International (LLLI), and I had never heard of a Lactation Consultant or Lactation Nurse. I didn’t know there was a such thing as a breast pump, a breastfeeding pillow, or nursing pads. Engorgement and hand expression were foreign to me. I didn’t even know HOW to get baby to nurse. Would he/she know what to do right away, or did I have to teach him or her? When will milk production begin? What if I don’t produce enough? What’s a galactagogue? I didn’t know much of anything. All I knew is that I wanted to breastfeed and I wanted to do so for as long as possible.

When my husband and I found out we were expecting, I told him I wanted to breastfeed. In fact, that was one of the first decisions I made. He was on board. I began to search for various breastfeeding resources on the Internet (some of my favorites are La Leche League International http://www.llli.org/ and Kelly Mom.com http://kellymom.com/).

I also checked out several breastfeeding books from the local library and began reading. Many of my questions were answered and I began to share what I learned with my husband. Sharing information with him was key in garnering his support.  I needed not only his support, but I also needed him to understand why I wanted to breastfeed, as well as understand the benefits for both the baby and myself.

It is a common misconception that breastfeeding involves only mom and baby, when the reality is; breastfeeding can be a family affair. I wanted my husband to be involved as much as possible, so once our baby was born, he was right beside me as I received help from a Lactation Nurse at the hospital. I recall having trouble with getting our newborn son to latch on, and my husband kindly reached over to help me using the tips the Lactation Nurse provided. He also helped me keep to my pumping schedule so he could feed our baby while I rested, ran errands, etc.

Overall, my breastfeeding experience has been remarkable.  However, I did experience some challenges. I often doubted that I was producing enough milk. Many days (and nights) I was exhausted. Sometimes, I wanted to quit. I would tell myself “It’s been 3 months; I gave it a great run.” However, my husband reminded me of my commitment, and renewed my confidence. I went from “OK, I think I want to stop breastfeeding now,” to “I CAN and WILL do this!”

I offer the following tips for engaging fathers and partners and garnering their support of breastfeeding:

1. Have the father/partner attend Lactation Consultant/Lactation Nurse appointments with you. This way, they can obtain information from the LC/Lactation Nurse firsthand, ask questions, and have a more hands-on experience (if they so wish). Besides, it’s helpful to have a second pair of eyes and ears!
2. Share information and resources with them. This may also encourage them to search for information on their own. While doing this, be mindful of information overload for the both of you. There is TONS of breastfeeding information out there and it is easy to become overwhelmed and sometimes confused.
3. Allow them to help. This help can come in the form of feeding the baby expressed breast milk, as well as helping support the baby or your breast while getting into a comfortable nursing position. There are many ways to help.