When I was asked to write a blog for MomsRising, I thought why would anyone at MomsRising want to hear what I have to say?  I am not a mom.  In fact I am a gay man with no children and………That is when I stepped back and realized I was now doing to myself what others have done to me my entire life.  I was undervaluing myself and dismissing my own thoughts and words. This type of self loathing mixed with a society filled with hate is why I feel we find ourselves in the position we are in now as a Nation.

I am organizing a rally in Washington, DC on August 13th to DISARM HATE. As a celebrity hairstylist in the film and TV industry, I would never have expected to find myself in this place but after Orlando I had no other choice.

Simply changing my Facebook profile photo was not going to make me feel whole again. This level of hate has to stop.  As a country of people, we have forgotten how to use our words and we have replaced them with guns. Easy to access guns and a nation filled with rage for anyone different is a horrifying combination. Welcome to 2016.

Now the first question I had to ask myself was what can I do? I have no experience in the world of activism or gun violence prevention.  I have however spent my entire life fighting for anything I feel I deserve. To watch nothing happen after Orlando and the inaction of our elected officials, I had to step up. 

You might say, “well what can he possibly do?” I can organize a rally based in love and anger and frustration and a need to be heard. We must take back our voices and control of the lives we lead. As a society we give so much of the control of our daily lives away.  Be it to elected officials or social media to shape our thoughts or to drug companies to fix something because we are merely too lazy or busy to work on the issue ourselves when correctable. Do you see a pattern here?  We give so much away and then feel helpless when nothing changes.  The problem is U.S., not them.

You can’t give someone else all the power and then get angry when nothing gets done.  How can we be angry when people fail us if we were never part of the discussion in the first place?

This way of thinking is what has led us here today.  A perfect example of when people minimize the need for Black Lives Matter.  The counter response that All Lives Matter is simply to defuse any discussion.  If you truly feel that All Lives Matter then you would work to correct the injustice perpetrated on the Black Community and on the LGBTQ Community.  Do you see my point? All Lives Don't Matter when you allow injustice between ALL lives. Once again the problem is us and our inability to stand up. If your friend makes a hateful, bigoted, racist or sexist joke and you say nothing you are just as guilty of fostering hate by saying nothing as they are for saying it in the first place.

I was home working on the Rally and writing this blog post for MomsRising and my doorbell rang. I walked to the front door as the lighting flashed and the rain started to fall, and I see a young black man standing all the way down my steps on the walkway. His name was Adrian Kendrick employee ID#18965. I started to cry right away as I realized that he was going door to door to sell books for school programs and as he stood in his shirt and tie (orange tie and shoe laces which wasn't lost on me as it is one of the primary colors of gun violence prevention groups). He has learned to ring the door bell and walk all the way off the porches and down the front steps before the person comes to the door to be safe and so they don’t feel threatened because he is a black man at their door. My heart broke. I invited him up to sit on my front porch to talk and as he sat there and we spoke, I realized he had what was obviously spit across his shoulder. I offered him a soda and asked if he needed a tissue to remove something on his shoulder. He was very ashamed. He told me a neighbor a block over spit on him when they opened the door. He was apologizing for coming to my door that way. What is wrong with our country?  He is trying to make a difference in his life. Even if you don't appreciate someone knocking on your door why would you racially insult and spit on a young man? What are we allowing to happen?  We must stand up and speak up for this is only getting worse.  Innocent people are being murdered by those sworn to serve and protect. Innocent police officers are being gunned down in retaliation because of the actions of others.  We must stop feeding hate with more hate.

How can we look at the children growing up today and not feel overwhelmed with emotions? How can we not fight to do something to change the course we are on as a nation? As a world?  Our collective greed, laziness, hate, fear and inability to speak up when we see a wrong are the reason we are falling apart as a people.  I know it must seem unfixable or so damaged a cause that even trying to fix it isn't even an option.  “I’ll leave it for the next guy to fix”. 

NO!  I wont do that.  I will do something.  I am begging you to do it with me. RSVP below and join me in Disarming Hate! Rally with us in Washington, DC on August 13th. If you can’t make it to Washington on August 13th, then organize something in your local community.  You owe it to yourselves, your community and your children.  Do something now.